Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Marion, MT
Thanked 24 Times in 22 Posts
iTrader Score: 0 reviews
Winkles, I thought of you instantly when I read this. It's from the Lincoln, NE Craigslist...and the guy's selling his 1st gen.... gotta love it!!
Up for sale is probably the last vehicle you will ever need. The good thing is you're probably going to need this vehicle very soon. You see, this truck is able to withstand an EMP attack, solar flares, or whatever it was the Mayans predicted that they screwed the date up on.
It's a '93 Dodge Ram 250.
I know, for most of you that's all I need to say, but I'm a guy that is willing to educate those that have had their head stuck in the sand, driving their hypermilers that get 40 mpg, so I'll give you the rest of the details.
This truck was made in '93 right after Clinton was elected. I think Iacocca knew then that the world was about to end, so he created the last vehicle a true survivalist would ever need. Have you seen the '94s? Yeah, those guys are not gonna make it.
It's got everything you're gonna need: 4 wheel drive....Auto trans...power windows....air conditioning....cruise control. If you're looking for a vehicle with power, look no further. This truck has enough torque that if your goober-assed cousin that has spent the last three years pissing you off finally pushes you over the edge.....You can easily hook up to his doublewide and drag him back into Oklahoma where he belongs.
This truck was painted by Detroit, and detailed by Mother Nature herself. If Dali worked in patina, even he could never hope to produce this beauty.
I drove this warrior truck only about 3000 miles. I couldn't handle the dominance. This type of authority is only designed for certain people. I couldn't cut it, and I knew it. Folks, this truck is an alpha-roll on wheels. (Everytime I would hit the throttle the radio would blare...."THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!" I didn't know what to do, so I'd just get out and start doing pushups until I could completely quote Leonidas when he spoke to Xerxes, "The world will know that free men stood against a tyrant, that few stood against many, and before this battle was over, even a god-king can bleed."
Much harder than you'd think when you are "In the moment and being held accountable".
Some of you that aren't quite ready for this type of power may be asking yourselves, "Will this haul a complete model train set?"..."How much imitation crabmeat can I fit behind the seat?"
Well boys, I'm not going to waste your time anymore. This truck is ready to take you to the next level. Wanna be tier one? All you have to do is accept the fact that you're ready to dominate in life. If you're ready to start living life, I don't have to tell you what to do. MOLON LABE!!!!!!!!
Call four zero two three one four 5266.
For all you that want to know the details. Nothing has been done to the pump, motor or trans. There are 190k on it and the speedo/odometer works fine.
Those of you wanting to call and help me sell this thing......Don't waste your time. You aren't awesome enough to be involved in this deal.
I'm so far behind, I think I'm ahead..
Last edited by hardtailjohn; 01-27-2013 at 01:35 AM.